omg i could kill her.
my friend was talking to me about her man friend.
he knocked her up once years ago, he went on knowing that he did and cheated on her with several women, broke up with her several times, bitched her out millions of times. she miscarried, he wasnt around.
recently shes been dating him again, he knocks her up YET AGAIN.
hes actin like he cares this n that, she decides for abortion. good choice k few weeks past hes not around. turns out this little punk was again…fucking other women. and to top it off she got the clap from him recently.
but she tells me “i still love him though :)”
HOW FUCKING RETARDED CAN YOU BE!!??
how much does it take for this bitch to understand…i dont love myself, i never really have. my imperfections bug the shit out of me. im not as perfect as other guys and it drives me insane. 2nd off just because i cant love myself doesnt mean i cant love someone else. god fucking damn…
3rd time this week i thought about killing myself. “dont do it caleb, dont do it. look where you got last time.” i fear its getting closer and closer to that point…
i wish she could stop being beautiful and full of life. because when i look at myself in the mirror i see a dead being void of love. i see a monster hurt all over, scars from wrist to heart. after that realization i see that i could never stand by her, and my chances with her are slim to 0.
So my mum likes to tell this story of when I played the angel Gabriel in a nativity play. Apparently I was about 7 and while I was meant to be standing all serene and angelic in the background, I got into some kind of fist fight with another angel.
My mum calls it an embarrassment.
I call it committing to the role